Why I’m so fucking depressed is beyond me tonight. Why this hurt is harboring over my heart…I can’t even begin to understand. Is this karma? Is it my own fault? I hate to be the complainer, so I tend to not tell anyone how I truly feel when it’s unpleasant. But my heart has been broken. You left me 7 months ago with bruises and cuts and I’m still fucked up over it. Why did you move on in 3 1/2 weeks with a new girl and STAY with her till this day? You are killing me. And i tell you that sometimes. I see you guys’ pictures together on instagram and twitter…i see all her happy tweets about you and how much she loves you. But if you are so damn happy why do you still call? Why do you still send that random text after not speaking to me for weeks just to say “i miss my princess…te amo para siempre” WHY…if you are so happy and want to be with her instead of me…WHY talk to me? Just please STOP. 

Oh but no…because when you ignore me, I literally feel like I am losing my mind. I can’t sleep or eat when we don’t speak for weeks at a time. I feel like everything I worked for a whole year and a half was all a waste of time and I have no way in or out of this endless cycle of confusion and self destruction. I don’t know why I love you so much…but I do. I did so much for you. I gave you everything and gave up everyone for you. The reason I breathed was for you and to make you happy. You became the reason I was a confident dancer..because I just wanted to dance for you and to make you proud when I performed on stage. 

Why did she have to come into your life? And why did you let her? Why do you even still love me if you have her..or are you lying?